Views: 21 · Added: 3 hours ago
I want and need a whoopin so bad right now that I am in tears, and being short with everyone.
I can get what I want and need, but refuse to for the sake of my sanity I think.
I'm not sure could be a whole bunch of other reasons also.
I accept things didn't work out the way I had hoped.
So do I continue to move on, or turn back?
Its as addictive as these stupid cigarettes I am now again smoking. GRRRRRRRRRRRR!!
I am gonna keep moving forward, as for these smokes, Ill try again tomorrow.
Have a good day everyone.
3 comments ·
Views: 11 · Added: 4 hours ago
Dunno about anyone else, but there is a huge difference for me between wearing a thong, or taking paddling nude. Especially when a male swatting, even more so with Nick applying it. I'm in spite of wanting to say anything nice about him, am very grateful he allows my thong. Jen, and Sue, always paddle naked, and from them prefer it. I feel weird if not nude for them. Being nude for male paddler makes me cringe. So a big thanks to step-son for allowing me the tiny shred of dignity that wearing a thong gives me.
0 comments ·
Views: 20 · Added: 5 hours ago
I had the best time with my lifestyle friends on Sunday. It was the 4 of us, we went to the movies and to Applebees. Those are some fun hilarious down-to-earth ass chicks. I love my lifestyle sisters.
After out outing, 4 more chicks hit me up. They all wanna go out with us. So I started this new lifestyle social group. Im excited to make my new friends.
So far, so good....
Views: 14 · Added: 6 hours ago
I have updated my profile to give people more of an idea of why I am here and my desires.
Views: 35 · Added: 8 hours ago
Job applications be like...If your on the job and John looks sad what do you do??Hell imma turn around and do my work...fuck John!
and another thing they asked do I believe in ghosts? There's no such things as ghost....
Just dark skin bitches playing in the dark being childish.
4 comments ·
Views: 68 · Added: 11 hours ago
I had to beat some butt earlier today. Why is tobacco so addictive? It's one of the biggest reasons I have to tear into some ass. 9 out if 10 spankers agree that Tobacco companies are the leading causr of ass whippings lol
I must be getting old since my arm got tired rather quickly. Gotta hit the gym :p
6 comments ·
Views: 20 · Added: 11 hours ago
Saw my friend this weekend. He always makes it a fantastic weekend. Although, 3 different punishment spankings...sheesh! LOL. One of them...yes Phil, I still sorta disagree with (but...not gonna complain about so-so grades again!). :P But, the other 2 I deserved and I learned from them. And the rest of the weekend was awesome, as usual. :)
Now...I need to attempt to focus on 4 finals coming up! One this week and 3 next week. School will be over next Friday, and then I start internship on the following Monday at one of the best hospitals in this area. From what I understand, the director of my school hand picked me and 3 others for this position, as they only take (what she calls) the best of the best. Yeah...um...no pressure there! I doubt I will get hired by them at the end of my internship, but, I do at least hope that I will do a good enough job to get a good reference for another position somewhere. Having their name on my resume is a huge thing.
So that's my babble for the evening. And now, it is bedtime since I don't want another punishment spanking! Good night all!
1 comments ·
Views: 29 · Added: 12 hours ago
And no, it's not from a spanking, lol. I helped the hubby chain and strap the load He picked up yesterday and had to roll straps when we dropped the first load. Sore arms, sore legs, sore back. But all worth it to spend time with the hubby and help him.
Views: 43 · Added: 12 hours ago
So I'm going to see Him next weekend and I can't wait. We're going to celebrate my birthday and spend some much needed time together.
He says that I haven't earned any strokes (our code for punishment spanking). I am due for maintenance though and a birthday spanking.
Last night, he gave me instructions on what to bring with me and I can't help but be confused and a bit apprehensive because the list included the black leather paddle with the holes in it (the one he used in our first video) and the green rubber paddle from Caneiac.
O.O (Big eyes)
Here is where the confusion comes in: If I'm not getting a punishment spanking, then why, praytell, is he instructing me to bring two such hellacious implements with me? When I asked him, he just laughed it off and said something flip like: "Oh, what's a birthday celebration without a few toys?" Uh huh. That's an answer (rolling my eyes).
Anyway, he also told me to bring the video camera so there may be some video footage of my torment.
Here are pictures of the implements of ass destruction we'll be "playing" with:
9 comments ·
Views: 45 · Added: 14 hours ago
A few more vids up! Saw aaaagggghhhh again this month. Posted a clip of her being spanked and one of her spanking me. She's learning fast!!
5 comments ·
Views: 24 · Added: 17 hours ago
I gave it a lot of thought, though being paddled by Nick humiliating in itself, no way I was going to be sexually humiliated. He can blister me until his arm is tired, but I get to wear a thong. So instead of my weekly with the ex, she watched. He used a Lexan with holes, and a big spencer with holes. His arm did not get tired, my butt was worn out. I'll take weekly discipline from him, and punishments too. But, I wear a thong, and only my ex, and his girlfriend get to watch. So once a week, it will be Nick using the paddles, BTW, I really do not like him. But Sue thinks it will be good for me, and everyone but me will enjoy it, "Who knows, you might learn to like it." i doubt that, time will tell.
Views: 55 · Added: 17 hours ago
Ok so I thought i had received the worse Spanking like a Month ago But i was Wrong Today OMG I Had BEEN TOLD to Stop Smoking since February 1 So i did but last week i Smoked for a week, My Disciplinarian asked me about it yesterday why did i tell Him i GOT MY ASS TOE THE FUCK UP With a Bath brush. ASS STILL HOTTTTT!!!!!! LOL
Views: 87 · Added: 17 hours ago
I knew it was coming and that it would be severe. I thought yards of heavy velvet could offer some protection but he simply ripped the material off at the seam and the petticoats and linen drawers, too. I've never seen such fury and I have been properly chastised for my insolence with much weeping and great gasps. I'm to stand here until he returns from his ride by which time I hope his anger is spent. The birch is on the bench behind me. You can just see the tip of the handle.
Edited to let you know, dear friends, all was forgiven when he returned a few hours later. He had ale on his breath but I dare not say a word for I had been corrected and was duly subdued, ashamed that I had behaved like a common wench and whipped like one for it. For his part, he was loving and tender and, since he might be amenable, I asked for a new dress. He told me to repair the one I had and if I could not, learn to sew. I can see now how much papa indulged me and I have much to learn. We ended the night in an embrace after he hung the birch near our bed and blew out the candles. He is teaching me many things.
I changed the avatar this morning so you can see the birch, wicked in a firm hand. I'll leave it to you, dear friends, to imagine whether he bent me over the bench or sat on it with me across his knee. In due time, I'll return to the girl with an apple but I'll bring this one out if ever I am birched again.
14 comments ·
Views: 44 · Added: 18 hours ago
I took my hand off the door knob and turned around. Josh was still sitting on the couch. He no longer had tears flowing down his cheeks. I figured he had had enough of my silliness.
I walked over to Josh and sat down next to him. I felt myself losing it. I looked into his eyes and told him I was sorry. “Josh, I’m truly sorry for the way I have been acting the past couple of days. You deserve better than a spoiled rotten brat, throwing temper tantrums every fifteen minutes over anything and everything. I hope you can forgive me for acting this way and I promise I will work on my attitude and especially my potty mouth,” Josh put his arms around me and gave me a big smile and a hug. He started to speak, but I put my finger to his lips to stop him from saying anything. I got up and went over to my purse and took out my hair brush and brought it over and placed it into Josh’s hand. I felt myself losing it again. I started to shake and I could feel my throat getting sore. The kind of sore you get when you try to hold back from crying. I walked to the side of Josh’s knees and I slowly bent over them. I pulled up my sundress and tugged at my panties. I tried to pull them down but only got as far as my lower bottom. I asked Josh to help me pull them down to my knees. “Josh, I can’t pull them down any further, will you please help me?” I could feel Josh placing his fingers under my panties and he started to pull them down. He took them all the way off and placed them next to my head, on the floor. There was complete silence. I needed to do this. I needed to turn myself over to Josh. I needed to show him that he was in charge of my well being and he was going to have to lay down the law when it came to my attitude. I just had too much of it and didn't know how to control it. “Jennie, are you sure you want this? You know that you deserve a solid spanking from me. I’m going to do a thorough job.” I took a deep breath and replied, “yes Josh, I’m turning myself over to you. I love you and don’t want to lose your love for me. I know that I’m tamable. You just need to be patient with me. All I ask is please don’t be too hard on my bottom today. It still hurts from all the other spankings I've gotten, and remember you already spanked me in the parking lot. With that said, I truly knew that it didn't influence Josh one bit. He was going to lay down the law as he saw fit. I waited for the brush to fall, the anticipation was gut wrenching. I started to shake even more and I was sobbing before the first crack of the brush landed. Ouch! Oh Josh, not so hard. Oh please, ouch no. I started to squirm and thrash around. I new if I jerked around too much Josh would put his leg over mine to keep me from struggling. That’s just what he did. I tried to put my hand back to cover my bottom after each smack, but he just took my hands into his and placed them behind my back. He was so strong that I was stuck. Josh kept spanking me, The smack came harder and faster with each smack. I knew that sitting was going to be out of the question for a long time. I must have gotten smacked over twenty times with that hairbrush. I was crying my eyes out. I started to hyperventilate and that’s when Josh stopped. He knew that I had reached my limit. I laid over his knees for at least five minutes trying to get control of myself. Josh was rubbing my back and shushing me, trying to calm me down. He didn't rub my bottom. He didn't believe in soothing a bottom after it was punished. That would defeat the purpose of the spanking. It’s suppose to hurt. I finally stopped sobbing enough that Josh lifted me up and place me on his lap. I threw my arms around his neck and buried my face into his chest. I always felt safe and under control of myself in that position. Josh pulled me back and wiped my tears from my face. He gave me some Kleenex to blow my nose. I felt like a little girl having her daddy wiping her runny nose. Josh made me feel little and venerable in his arms. Josh whispered in my ear, “Jennie it’s OK, I love you with all my heart. It will be OK. We’re going to have a wonderful life together. Your bottom and my hand were made for each other.”
7 comments ·
Views: 15 · Added: 19 hours ago
Had a wonderful weekend with the hubby and yes, I stayed out of trouble, lol. Went on a run with them yesterday. Can't wait till this summer when I can stay out longer with him!
Views: 32 · Added: 1 days ago
Well my plans for the day have been canceled.
Its a bummer when that happens!!! lol
Then again, not really. I need to catch up on a few things around my home.
Like mopping my floors, laundry, and other things I'm sure I will find in need of care.
Have a wonderful day STUBE. It is beautiful out, so first I'm going to walk to the store and get a few things.
2 comments ·
Views: 83 · Added: 1 days ago
Hey everybody hope all is well with everyone, wish I could say it was for me, but I refuse to get on here and lie. I've never been able to smile when I'm feeling low, or like passenger says only miss the sun when it starts to snow....lol. I am trying to decide if I can stay in Florida until I finish school. I dont have any reason to stay here, besides my daughter loving it here because of her friends. I'm not really looking forward to going back to cold weather, but when I weigh out the pros and cons between staying here in Florida or leaving to go back to the Midwest, I see more cons in the Midwest or Tampa because i miss my church family in Tampa and the access to the things I need and dont have here in this little city. So its between going back to Tampa or going back to the Midwest either Wisconsin or Illinois. I'm at a crossroad yal.
I smoke constantly because I have so much on my mind. I've made a couple of friends here that I may miss that's about it.Plus none of my family here and its so hard to get help when I need it. The thing that bothers me the most is I got to go back to work tomorrow lol. I guess I will talk to my daughter about this and explain to her why we cant stay in this city. If I had to stay in Florida it would be back in Tampa, where i have more access to the things I need.Have you ever felt like disappearing and not looking back? Thats how I feel right now. I will only have 34 credits to earn in 2 weeks after this intermediate Algebra is done.....that right there kinda gives me a reason to smile...;)
Yesterday I felt like running, and I know this smoking is going to make that hard, but I think if I leave this city I can be less stressed and smoking can be a thing of the past. Ive also been looking at cars because I plan to buy one at the end of may unless I move back to the midwest.....I would rather get it there. Aint nobody going to make you happy, you have to make yourself happy or put yourself in situations that you know will produce happiness, so I guess it's my move now!!!!
my lease is up in August, I doubt I will be renewing it. The only thing that is guaranteed in life is change! we are forever changing and so is this world...its just a matter of adapting to these changes, that sometimes throws us for a loop, but it is still possible. We all go through shit yal, It just happens to be one of those times for me, but I am going to make it better! I plan to keep on pushing and stay focused on the things that I'm doing right now that are going to better my life. So today is my last day off and I am going to enjoy it!!!!
hope everyone else has a productive day!
Views: 55 · Added: 1 days ago
There was silence. I didn't dare speak. The truck turn down the street to Josh’s house. He had purchased a home about a mile from my parents. I had never been there before, so I was some what interested in seeing his man cave. He and my brother were roommates, so I was very interested in what the place looked like.
I wasn't sure if I was safe going there today. Who knew what Josh had planed. My heart started to beat faster. I was starting to hyperventilate. I never thought I would be scared to be by myself with Josh. I didn't know if we were just going to talk, if I was going to get another spanking or if he was going to deflower me. It seemed like when he talked to me lately it was while I was always over his knee. I wondered if we would ever be able to have a normal conversation without me getting my bottom blistered. He was getting more confident each time he spanked me. I truly didn't think my bottom could take another spanking.
Josh pulled into his driveway and turned off the truck. Not a word was spoken. He opened his door, got out, then slammed it closed. He walked around the front of the truck. I was getting scared, not knowing what trouble I was in. I quickly locked the door just in time. Josh placed his hand on the door handle and couldn't open the door.
I've noticed lately when Josh is about to lose his patients with me, his right eyebrow will curl up. His scowl is the scariest thing I've ever seen. It reminds me of a mad bull ready to charge. This was the look he was giving me. I was sure I saw steam blowing out his nostrils.
“Jennie, you best be opening this door.” Josh was not in the mood for games. I wasn't playing a game, I was trying to survive. I knew he held my life in his hands. He thought he was the person to make all the decisions in my life. No, he had it all wrong.
“No, I’m not going to open it until you promise you wont spank me.”
Josh took his keys and I heard the click of the lock. Oh gosh, I quickly re locked the door. We went back and forth for a minute or so, until I screwed up and pushed the unlock button by mistake.
I didn't know what hit me, I was out of the truck in two seconds and slung over Josh’s shoulder. I couldn't believe how fast he had me on the porch to his house.
I bawled my hands into fists. I started to hit Josh’s back, crying at him to put me down. I should have known that I was no match for Josh. He applied his hard hand to my backside. I had put on a sundress this morning and the skirt part was hanging down over my back, leaving only my lacy panties to protect my bottom. He gave me five hard swats to my bottom.
“Listen here young lady. I hadn't planed on giving you a spanking, but if you keep on hitting me I promise I will take my belt to your bare bottom, so help me. Just settle down.”
I figured I better stop with the useless attack on Josh’s back. All it was getting me was a sore bottom. “Do you promise not to spank me? I don’t think I could survive another one.”
Josh opened the door and walked over to the couch in the front room. He lowered me onto the couch. “SIT and DON’T. YOU. MOVE!”
Boy was he mad. He had never raised his voice to me in that way. I knew that I better do what he said. “Yes sir.”
What did I just say? I was shocked that “yes sir” just came out of my mouth. The only person I have ever said that to was my dad and that was when he had me over his lap applying his hand to my bottom, which was almost never. Josh was treating me just like a child. I’m not a child, I’m a grown woman. He better start remembering that, because I wont stand, being treated this way.
Josh went to the refrigerator and got two bottles of water. He walked over and handed me a bottle. “Take a big drink Jennie, all those tears you've been shedding will dehydrate you. Yep, he’s always watching out for me, or was it he once again telling me what to do?
“Thank you for the water." I took a sip. Josh was right, I had shed a rainfall of tears these past few days and I was so thirsty. I drank about half of the bottle.
Josh sat down next to me and took the bottle of water from my hand and put it down on the table in front of us. He lifted me up and placed me on his lap. At least it wasn't over his lap. So far so good.
I couldn't look into his eyes. I didn't know what to say. I wanted him to explain what he wanted from me.
Josh cupped my face in his hands and gave me a kiss on the lips. Nothing toe curling, but enough to give me that little twinge between my thighs.
Josh put his arms around me and brought me to his chest. I was lost in his caress. I wanted to stay this way for the rest of my life. I felt safe and warm when he held me.
Josh reached under my chin and lifted it so our eyes met. He had a tear falling down his cheek. I was speechless, lost for words. Why was he crying. I was the one who should be crying. I had had my bottomed spanked at least a million times in the past few days and I had practically been given away by my parents to a man who had appointed himself to tame me.I was spanked and humiliated by my so called boyfriend in the parking lot of McDonald's and he was crying. Where does he get off showing that kind of emotion.
“Josh, why are you crying? Your not the one who has been beaten so many times in the past few days, and in the parking lot of McDonald's no less. I don’t care if you have tears running down your face. I don’t want to be here and you need to take me home right this minute.”
Complete silence. Not a word is being said. Oh boy, I’m in so much trouble.
I slowly got up off his lap and started for the front door. I wasn't sure if it was the right decision to make but I needed to get out and far away as fast as I could.
“Jennie, If you walk out that door it will be over. I wont bother you anymore. I wont be there to make sure you’re OK. You can go on making bad choices, continue to act like a spoiled brat who has a potty mouth and never have the life you could have with my love. You know that you love me just a much as I love you. We have been hiding our love from each other all these years. You were way to young in the beginning for me. I know I had to let some years go by before we could show our love for each other. I know that it’s time for us to start our future together”
I got as far as the front door. I had my hand on the door knob, starting to turn it. I knew that all I had to do was pull on the knob and I would be out the door and down the street. If I did this it would be all over between us before it actually really started.
It’s only been a few days that Josh told me he had true feelings for me. It was all so much to take in. My folks had practically throne me into his arms. I felt like I was a princess and the king and queen had picked my prince charming out for me to marry.
This isn't a fairy tale, it’s real life and it’s just not done that way. I wanted to pick my own prince charming, but the problem was Josh was my prince charming.
The other problem was I was being so pigheaded. I wanted to be the one to make the decisions not everyone else. I hate to be told what to do. My parents and Josh went about it all wrong. They blew it.
They know that I was a spoiled brat who always got her way. Why would this be any different.
I just need to explain this to Josh. Make him understand that it has to be my decision not anyone else’s. I love him and want to be with him, but it has to my idea.
The more I thought about it, I was really acting like a spoiled brat. We both want to be with each other, so why am I acting so horrid.
At that moment I knew what I needed to do.
To be continued
Views: 73 · Added: 1 days ago
When you do what most people dont find "normal" it is easy to fall under ridicule be isolated and become the butt end of a lot of peoples jokes.
They wait for you to fail they wait for you to give up they wait for you to complain they wait for you to quit
But when you dont
And you succeed.. You remain consistent you see massive results and become the Beacon of Light that sets the Standard for "how it should be done"
They will want to take you to lunch, Call you for advice, Tell others about your story and brag about you being their friend they will want to invite you to their parties, and show you off
They will Stand proud that you were willing to stick it out
Because the truth is THEY NEED YOU TO SUCCEED
Your Success gives them Hope your Success shows them that it can happen your Success becomes their motivation you become their Role Model....
So you must continue to do what others wont so you can live like others cant
Views: 51 · Added: 1 days ago
Some call it luck, I call it BLESSED!!!
I started cleaning for a gentleman back in November, and have picked up a few other jobs since then.
They all still pay me even when I can't work, wether it be due to their circumstances or mine.
I asked one of them why and they simply said "Because Sara, you deserve it!"...
Its amazing how the simplest words can make you feel so awesome.
I AM BLESSED!!!